some background... soon's favorite word is yangbo, phoon has retinal detachment

soon: look what i found!  binoculars!

phoon: hey, those are mine!  fine... give me the monocular i gave you.

soon:  no, i like that one better, you can have the binoculars.

phoon:  but i only have one eye.  give me the monocular!

soon:  just use the binocular and close one eye.

phoon:  actually, i don't have to close it... i only have one eye, remember?  and you just use it to spy on people.  you're so weird!

soon:  so... people think it's cool and ask to use it.  but i say, no, get your own!